Do you hear that sound? It's crickets, chirping in the background of my brain, because I'm having trouble coming to terms with the fact that this is the episode we got in the lead-up to sweeps. Now, Glee is rarely logical. The plot lines are very very rarely things that might actually happen in real life. But this week felt like an excess.
Please, Glee writers, show me the schools in small town Ohio that allow students to just transfer in and out with no repercussions to speak of. And while you're at it, show me the qualified physician who advises-- nay, pressures-- a seventeen year old to get a nose job.
Let's talk about the Quinn-used-to-be-ugly plot. Is this real life? Is this seriously what they're going to use to explain her character? Weak, Glee, even for you. Not only is this a staple of almost every lame ugly duckling rom-com ever made, it's down right unrealistic. One of the things that sucks most about high school (and college, if we're being honest) is that there are girls who are just more absurdly beautiful than everyone else without even trying. They were, in fact, born that way (see what I did there?). And silly me, but I thought this show was about showing something real about the high school experience.
One high point: [about Barbara Streisand] "Is she here?!" "No, it's a mall in Ohio."
Was that another mall flash-mob? Where have I seen that before...? Oh yeah, last season on this show. Also, that "Barbara Streisand" song is the worst. It is also pointless. Seriously.
The Lauren vs. Quinn rivalry might actually have had potential way back when, because it would have genuinely been interesting to see who the students voted for, just as they were presented. I know a lot of schools, my former high school included, where "alternative" looking candidates for homecoming queen won by a landslide, without things having to get ugly. I have to say I was happy at the end when they admitted a kind of grudging respect/affection for each other.
And Emma with her OCD? First, it must be said that I read something about their being "Emmy buzz" about this performance. Uhm, I'm sorry, what performance? Jayma Mays did exactly what she always does, and despite the hype they gave her barely anything to work with. I was expecting this episode to have a lot more with her (but there's my lesson learned, isn't it? Never expect things from this show.) Also, this is a comedy, and while she wasn't funny in this episode, she also wouldn't be able to qualify for a Drama award. Just sayin'.
I did get my wish for more Rachel/Puck time, and I'm glad that it came in the form of him trying to keep her from changing her appearance. Puck is the one guy on the show who has consistently been up front with Rachel about thinking she's attractive, so I'm happy they tied him in to this story.
I also liked that we got a renewed, albeit brief, look at nice-guy Finn again this week. Personally, I think he's at his best when he's capable of being sweet to both Quinn and Rachel regardless of which one he's dating, it just makes him seem more genuine overall.
And then we finally got to Gaga, the very hyped headlining number. I have to admit, I was highly distracted by trying to read all of their specialized t-shirts while they danced around (I'm still trying to figure out the meaning of Puck's...was it just me or could that actually be construed as kind of sweet?), but Tina/Mercedes/Kurt on vocals was a-okay in my book. Feel free to repeat that collaboration any time, guys.
It's a sad sad episode when Santana and Karofsky's plan to serve as one another's "beards" is the most realistic part. Although that scene with her and Brittany was slightly redeeming as well. I'm not gonna lie, I'd probably watch a Santana spin off at this point-- she just has so much potential that Glee has kind of been refusing to tap.
